Client Spotlight: Men Too Matter

As we continue to acknowledge the extreme importance of Men’s Mental Health Month, the Melo Technology team would like to shine an incredibly important spotlight on Men Too Matter. Founded by Ashmeed Khan in 2022, this Ajax, Ontario-based non-profit organization aims to prevent vulnerable men from acting on their suicidal thoughts.  

The objective of Men Too Matter is to provide men who are suffering from significant mental health issues with a safe and healthy environment that offers numerous services. They include transitional housing, access to employment services, legal, mental and spiritual counselling as well as several educational workshops.

The origin of Men Too Matter comes from a very personal place.

Ashmeed is intensely familiar with mental health issues of his own. A husband of 25 years and a father of five children, his battle with emotional trauma reached its pinnacle when his marriage crumbled. Things started taking a turn once he was elected as Local Councillor for Ward 2 in Ajax during the 2018 municipal elections. “Rock bottom” for Ashmeed came on the day he had no choice but to inform his 11-year old son that he wouldn’t be returning home.

“I was being all macho and upbeat about the divorce,” he recalls, “Then my son called me and said ‘Daddy, what time are you coming home?’ I just shattered. It broke me into a million pieces.”

The loss of the family unit is a top cause for men’s stress.

Ashmeed notes that the breaking down of spousal relationships and most notably, the destruction of the family unit are what top the list of culprits for the deterioration of men’s mental health. Financial concerns follow as another top stress causer for men. Following the dissolution of his marriage, Ashmeed felt that he was falling short of his responsibilities to protect his children.

“I couldn’t sleep because I’m the one who closes the door,” he shares, “I make sure the windows and the gates on the stairs are locked so the kids won’t fall. You do that for 25 years and all of a sudden you can’t.”

Ashmeed turned his focus to providing all he could for his family.

This came at the expense of Ashmeed’s own lifestyle’s comforts. Sleeping in his office became the norm. Naturally, as a public figure, Ashmeed was concerned about the news of his domestic dispute becoming widespread news. The weight of this stress took its toll.

“My life was public,” Ashmeed details, “It was all over Twitter. These things broke me. The thought started crossing my mind that I can’t live through this. I just should just end it right now.”

Ashmeed’s spiritual beliefs, encouraged by his dedication to Islam, prevented him from taking his own life. It also spawned the idea of Men Too Matter. After speaking with a friend, who was also battling marital difficulties, he realized that, while women seem to have numerous outlets to count on for support, men have nearly none to speak of.

The birth of Men Too Matter was encouraged by women.

Ashmeed is adamant about highlighting that Men Too Matter is far from an anti-woman movement. In fact, it’s quite the opposite. Numerous women encouraged him to found the organization as they were feeling the immeasurable pain of losing their fathers, husbands and sons to mental anguish-induced suicide.

Born in Guyana, Ashmeed is also strongly aware of how scarce support for mental health concerns are among members of the Caribbean culture. “It’s non-existent,” he laments, “I just spent three months in Guyana. Three of my friends were ready to take their lives. I went down there and was able to help them to avoid doing that. It was just through coaching them and spending time with them.”

It’s important to note that providing mental health support to Caribbean men is no easy feat. It’s a culture, Ashmeed admits, where showing a soft side is widely frowned upon. “Here, people are much more supportive,” he says, “I couldn’t wait to come back to Canada.” He points out that his Men Too Matter support sessions see men from a wide variety of cultures. They all seek and receive support, knowing they don’t have to battle the stigmas that are often prevalent in their native nations.

Men are their own worst enemies.

Ashmeed also highlights that the main reason men find it so hard to admit that they live with hurt feelings is… other men. “It’s us,” he passionately shares, “Men are men’s greatest enemies.” Ashmeed insists that the concept of being “strong”, “macho” and “manly” all work against the betterment of men’s mental health. Contrarily, seeking help, admitting the presence of pain and being willing to talk things out is so much more helpful.

Today, Ashmeed is a certified life coach. “To get a man to talk can feel absolutely impossible,” he points out, “I have sessions that are pro-bono for the community. We sit down, we let it out, we cry, we hug, whatever it takes. We provide a safe space where guys can talk. What I realize is that talking it out, getting it out of your system solves 80 percent of the problem.”

Melo Technology is a fervent supporter of Men Too Matter.

Our Founder and CEO, John Meloche is so passionate about Ashmeed’s message and initiatives that he was willing to design the Men Too Matter website free of charge. The benefits of Melo Technology’s Web Design and Website Maintenance services have greatly helped Ashmeed to spread the all-important word about men’s mental health and the need to support it with compassion and understanding.

Although June is Men’s Mental Health Month, it’s important to look after your emotional status all year long. If you or anyone you know is going through a major mental health battle, don’t think twice about seeking support. To get in touch with Men Too Matter, please don’t hesitate to send an email to info@mentoomatter.com. Alternatively, feel free to send them a message on their Contact page.

To learn more about how Melo Technology’s Web Design and Website Maintenance services can help to your grow your organization, please don’t hesitate to give us a call at 1-888-MELOTEL. You may also fill out the form on our Contact page.